Some of the Erotic Studies class has gathered in the gymnasium, with a large distance between them all.
Hats: Thank you for coming everyone! Now let's just go over the rules one last time. Some of you have been here before, others, this is your first time. And of course, due to the circumstances, there are special restrictions in place tonight! A minimum of 20 feet between each of us at all times! And even though we're all going to be getting naked, the masks have to stay on at all times! Got it? And because we have to stand extra far apart tonight, Dr. Goodlove has contributed an extra step tonight to help bring us together in a more metaphorical sense. Dr. Goodlove?
Goodlove: Thank you, Dr. Winters! I would like to share with you a technique of enhancing kinship that I learned in my studies of Mesoamerican cultures. Originally this would have been performed with a specially prepared cacao mixture that would be passed around and drunk from a ceremonial vessel. But out of deference to the cultures now passed into history, and personal safety, we will substitute these brownies. Please eat with me now, and think as we chew, "we are all one family"!
Hats: Uhh, professor, these aren't . . . well, weed brownies, are they?
Goodlove: Oh, no, no, of course not!
Hats: It's just that you have been known to espouse your fondness for weed in the past.
Goodlove: Oh quite! But that's not appropriate here, no, not at all!
Hats: All right then. Now let's start to undress. Take it slow, and be sure to keep breathing. Look around at each other, and reflect on what you see. Don't we all seem a little more alike than we did just a bit ago?
Goodlove: And if you find yourself feeling connected to each other, that's perfectly normal.
Hats: Exactly! We're all humans in the end!
Goodlove: Empathy is a common effect of MDMA, so just relax and let it take you where it takes you. Go with the flow, and we'll all come to understand each other soon.
Hats: Well put. Wait, what?
Hats: Did you say MDMA?
Goodlove: Sure did.
Hats: There was . . . ecstasy in those brownies??
Goodlove: Only the finest. Just like we agreed.
Hats: What the hell are you talking about?? I didn't agree to do any drugs!! I thought this was just a ritual!!
Goodlove: Don't you remember? It was when we were deciding that we felt like we could do the nude class after all, with extra precautions!
Hats: . . . When??
Goodlove: Well there was concern that we'd be standing even farther apart that usual, so I said . . .
Flashback to the meeting:
Goodlove: Well there's plenty of other ways we can overcome that. Shared participatory experiences often bring people together. There's certain rituals we could do, or drugs that produce an empathizing effect.
Hats: Ha ha, yeah, right! We'll all get super high together!
Hats: We thought you were joking! No one was expecting that you'd actually follow through on that!!
Goodlove: Y-you weren't?
Hats: NO!
Goodlove: Oh. Well then I really shouldn't have added that LSD to the brownies too then.
Hats: Ohhh shiiiiiiiiit . . .
